Thursday, May 22, 2008

Thought-Free Speech

Trying to make sense of Washington politicians will strain your brain. So as a service to the "multitude" who read this blog, I offer definitions of common political phrases:

if it saves just one life
As in: If banning all industrial production saves just one life, it will be worth it.
Meaning: Quit thinking rationally and just admit that I have the superior moral position.

for the sake of the children
As in: The National Abortion Rights Action League is pro-choice ... for the sake of the children.
Meaning: I have no rational argument, so I'm feigning concern for children as a smoke screen to foist my agenda.

can't we just get along
As in: We have to ask the jihadists and zionist alike: "Can't we just get along?"
Meaning: Can't we just blame the actions of the guilty on the innocent so I can feel good about myself?

let's talk
As in: What's wrong with Barack Obama's simply saying to Iran: "Let's talk"?
Meaning: What'ya say we throw Israel under the bus? It'll win Barack Obama a Nobel Peace Prize.

give peace a chance
As in: We beg the Israelis and Palestinians alike: "Give peace a chance."
Meaning: Make no distinction between perpetrators and victims.

embrace diversity
As in: Those who will not embrace diversity will not be tolerated.
Meaning: Your age-old morals that call evil "evil" are inferior to my trendy new ones that call evil "good".

tolerance
As in: Tolerance is the cornerstone of democracy.
Meaning: Keep your moral judgments to yourself ... or else.

intolerance
As in: The only thing that can't be tolerated is intolerance.
Meaning: The only thing that can't be tolerated is an opinion I don't like.

think globally -- act locally
As in: To solve Earth's environmental problems we must think globally and act locally.
Meaning: Ignore the realities of human nature that are right in front of you, and never miss an opportunity to throw sand in the gears of the economy.

it's your upbringing
As in: You may be a violent person, but it's your upbringing that made you that way.
Meaning: Claiming victimhood is so much easier than facing the evil in you.

it's not your fault
As in: You may be a violent person, but it's not your fault.
Meaning: Claiming victimhood is so much easier than dealing with the consequences of your own bad decisions.

it's George Bush's fault
As in: I may be an angry person, but it's George Bush's fault.
Meaning: When it comes to blaming my neuroses on someone else, Chimpee McHilter (along with his handler, Karl Rove) is almost as good a patsy as the Jews.

you're entitled
As in: As your Congressman, it's my job to see to it that you'll get what you're entitled to.
Meaning: If you'll just adopt an entitlement mentality, I can use that to manipulate you.

it's a disease
As in: You can't do anything about your kleptomania, your lying, your gambling, etc. -- it's a disease.
Meaning: Claiming powerlessness over your misconduct is so much easier than reforming.

you were born that way
As in: You can't do anything about your homosexuality -- you were born that way.
Meaning: Claiming powerlessness over your misconduct is so much easier than reforming.

terrorizing
As in: The repressive regime in Israel is terrorizing the peace-loving Palestinians.
Meaning: Blaming Jews is tried and true.

we've got to do SOMETHING
As in: Maybe it won't work, but we've got to do SOMETHING.
Meaning: You can't make me think in terms of cause and effect -- more of what caused the problem is sure to fix it.

4 comments:

Jerry said...

Bob,

Keep it up and everyone will think that you are one of those "bitter Americans" that Barack Hussein Obama was referring to in San Francisco.

(Don't worry though, you aren't the only one.)

buffi said...

Yep. I knew I liked you, Bob.

Mrs. Who said...

I need to get several of the teachers I work with to post this list next to their televisions. They need to refer to it frequently as they watch the MSM espouse leftist crap.

Jerri junque said...

I have said for the last few months that someone just needs to tell me how to vote. My head hurts trying to figure it all out.