Wednesday, January 18, 2012

It's in the Bible

At Bible class tonight we were reading from Second Samuel chapter three. The pastor paused for a moment at the end of verse fourteen: "And David sent messengers to Ishbosheth Saul's son, saying, 'Deliver [me] my wife Michal, which I espoused to me for an hundred foreskins...'"

Inga, a kindly 90-year-old widow, interrupted to ask a nagging question: "How long is a hundred foreskins?"

Seeing that Inga had mistakenly assumed that a foreskin was some ancient measure of time (like a fortnight or something), I jumped in to set her straight: "About five feet."

Monday, January 16, 2012

Inquiring Minds Want to Know

Yesterday, while driving home from church, a burning question suddenly sprang into my head, so of course I had to pose it to my loving bride: "If the abbreviation for 'First Lady Of The United States' is FLOTUS, what does that make our current 'First Lady Against The United States'?" Joyce was duly impressed by my insightful question, but sadly she was unable to give me a satisfactory answer.

So I (being the incessantly inquisitive person I am) have been mentally gnawing on this bone ever since. Luckily, I'm not merely incessantly inquisitive, I'm also technically savvy -- savvy enough to know that ever since Al Gore invented his Information Super Highway (a.k.a., the Interweb), finding answers to such stuff is as easy as typing a word or two into "The Google". You wouldn't believe all the fascinating things you learn when you enter "FLATUS" into The Google.

For instance, check out this out-of-this-world story.